SueVivor: Lord of the Rings
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Favorited: 0
Favorited: 0
Published: Apr 17, 2008
Revised: Apr 17, 2008
Words: 5,048
Genre: Drama
Type: Story
Revised: Apr 17, 2008
Words: 5,048
Genre: Drama
Type: Story





2 ratingsparody of Lord of the Rings
SueVivor: Lord of the Rings
Who will be the Ultimate LOTR Mary Sue?
Summary: Ten Mary Sues, nine challenges, one winner who will be the Ultimate LOTR Mary Sue?
SueVivor: Lord of the Rings
Summary: Ten Mary Sues, nine challenges, who will be the Ultimate LOTR Mary Sue?
Disclaimer: I do not own LOTR or the idea of SueVivor. I do own the Mary Sues and Kaylie, who is an OC of mine.
Contestants:
Xantha, the Warrior!Feminist!Sue
Lynda, the Dropped-into-ME!Sue
Vanesse, the Elrond’s-Daughter!Sue
Laivine, the Self-Insert!Sue (Laivine is my name translated into Quenya, if you’re wondering)
Faekatherinastarlightandromeda, the All-Around!Sue
Kate, the Anti!Sue
Eliora, the Sister!Sue
Edalariel, the Tragic!Sue
Jasmyna, the HP-Crossover!Sue
Elvira, the Sauron’s-Daughter!Sue
Chapter 1
Ten females stood outside the House of Elrond. They were all very beautiful, with “long flowing hair”, “heart-stopping smiles”, and a “perfect complexion”. They were also “thin enough to be anorexic” and “dressed in a way that suited them perfectly”. Well, except one of them (Kate), but there was still something Sue-ish about her.
“Oh, look!” said Eliora, “We’re in Rivvendal!” Eliora had wheat-colored hair and dark gray eyes.
“Of course we’re not!” said Vanesse, “It’s Rivindil.” Vanesse had flashing emerald eyes, raven hair, pointed ears, and “beauty to rival that of Luthien Tinuviel”.
“Actually,” said Lynda, “It’s, like, Riverdael.” She had platinum-blonde hair, amber eyes, and a charming smile.
“It’s Rivendel! Duh!” said Kate. Kate had limp dirty-blonde hair that was only shoulder length. She was kind of overweight and had a small chest. Her eyes were just plain brown. Kate considered herself to be above the other Sues because she was less recognizable as one.
Then, the four Sues began arguing about how Rivendell was spelled, and no, not one of them guessed Rivendell.
In the meantime, Xantha was practicing her swordplay, Edalariel was crying, and Faekatherinastarlightandromeda was singing “May It Be”, Elvira and Jasmyna were talking and giggling about how hot Legolas was, and Laivine was arguing that “Bori” was hotter.
Suddenly, in a dramatic flash of light, the host appeared. At the sight of her, the Mary Sues all sighed disappointedly.
“Hello, everyone,” said Kaylie, “This is SueVivor, and I’m Kaylie, your host!”
“Noooo!” yelled Jasmyna, “Why couldn’t our host be a hot guy, like Legolas?” Jasmyna’s
hair was so brown it was almost black, long, and wavy, and she had big blue eyes.
Kaylie dropped her smile and glared at her. Then she continued, “As you know, the winner of SueVivor will be the ultimate Lord of the Rings Mary Sue. She will be known forever as the worst Mary Sue to ever sleep with a canon male in Middle Earth!”
“I am so going to win this!” said Lynda.
“Lynda,” said Kaylie, “Your type of Sue has won most of the SueVivors so far. Do you think you can continue that tradition?”
“Like, totally!” said Lynda with a flip of her hair.
“Faekatherinastarlightandromeda, the last time an All-around!Sue was on here, she got kicked off for Imperiousing the contestants. Knowing this, do you think you’ll win?”
“Oh, why, of course I can,” said Faekatherinastarlightandromeda, emphasizing as much as possible, “After all, just because some member of a species did something, that doesn’t mean they all do that, does it? If it were, the whole human race would not have survived. I intend to win this and disprove the stereotype against All-Around!Sues!”
“That’s nice,” said Kaylie, “Kate, there’s never been an Anti!Sue on here before. Do you think you can win?”
“Sure!” said Kate, giving Faekatherinastarlightandromeda a look that said, “And that is called being brief.”
Suddenly the doors to Elrond’s house opened and Kaylie led the Sues inside.
“Ooh!” said Elvira, “Maybe we’ll see Elrond!” Elvira had midnight hair, icy cerulean eyes, and
very pale skin.
“You do know Elrond’s old enough to be your great- great- great- great- great- great- great-grandfather, Elvira, don’t you?” Kate said.
“Oh, and who do you like?” Jasmyna asked, “None of the hot guys here are young, you know.” Jasmyna and Elvira had gotten to know each other very well during their giggly-fangirl discussion on “Leggie”, and they had become good friends.
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