Movie Madness; TV Trouble

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Movie Madness; TV Trouble

This is all a very strange dream…

Actually, it is.

Wait, I’ve had this dream before.

My eyes opened, and like all the nights before, I left my dream world unsatisfied with what had taken place. Out of my entire family, which consisted of my sister, my two brothers, and my parents, I always ended up having the weirdest dreams – don’t ask why. One time they’d be action/adventure type dreams where’d I end up almost getting killed, then the flying dreams (but those were rare, and I always had to flap to fly! Go figure!), and then very rarely, those nice, happy dreams. Normally, though, it was evil people, be they vampires or assassins, chasing me and trying to kill me. And for some reason, every time I tried to run, my legs felt like lead and I’d barely escape alive.

I was tired of my dreams, but what I could do about it?

The next night, despite trying to stay up late to avoid dreaming, I eventually fell asleep. But when I found myself in a dream, I saw no one else but Elizabeth Bennet and Mr. Darcy!

“What in the…”

“Elizabeth!” Mr. Darcy cried. I looked at Elizabeth but found that somehow I had turned into Elizabeth!

“Shoot!” I cried. “This isn’t my dream! I don’t have these dreams!” To my sudden horror, I realized, even in my dream-state, that this dream was a dream that my sister had told me about! She’d been in a field and suddenly, she became Lizzy Bennet and Mr. Darcy came running after her. “Oh, geez,” I said. I turned to run but found my legs feeling like lead once again. “NOT AGAIN!” I yelled, trying to move my iron-like feet. I tried to remember the rest of the dream, but it was hard because I’d never really paid attention to my sister’s going on about her dreams. Now I wish I had.

Then, of course, it began to pour. I felt my dress (I hated dresses! Why me?) growing sopped. Mr. Darcy was striding towards me, looking very real.

“Come on!” I wracked my brain for memory of my sis’s ramblings. Wait! I remembered! She had been just about to kiss Darcy when she had woken up! “Isn’t it how it works every time?” I wondered. “Well, since this isn’t technically my dream, I can change it!” I ran towards Darcy and reached up to kiss him - but found that I was no longer staring at Mr. Darcy and no longer in the middle of a field.

What I was staring at was a giant beluga whale about to run into me!

“NO!” I hollered, trying to frantically swim (I had ended up in a pool somehow) away from the impending danger. But it was no use, the whale rammed into me, and I was flung up onto the rocks. “Great,” I seethed, picking myself up gingerly. “Why do I get all the crazy dreams and feel pain in every single one of them?” I was going to kill my sister for telling me her dream.

I turned around to face the next danger – and nearly walked onto a highway. I froze as a car rushed towards me and shut my eyes – but when I opened them, I was in a forest. I managed to move and began walking somewhere, still wary of my surroundings.

“HELLLLLO Jerry!”

I whirled around and stared at none other than George Costanza from “Seinfeld.” Glancing around, I was now in Jerry’s apartment. Wait, was I Jerry?

“Uh, hi?” I ventured nervously. Needless to say, I was incredibly relieved when Jerry came out of the bathroom, shaking a bathrobe in his hand.

“Can you believe this?” He said. “I’ve had this bathrobe for ten years – ten years! And now they’re saying that terry cloth gives you measles.” He coughed. “I’m getting it!”

George stepped back. “Get away from me, then! What are ya trying to do, kill me? You know I can’t take getting sick, Jerry!”

“The world would be a better place,” Jerry said thoughtfully.

I shook my head and groaned. I wished my sister didn’t love the show so much… and I really didn’t love this dream. I opened my mouth to say something, but Jerry and George had disappeared. Could I never get a word in? Maybe that was why my sister talked so much all the time – she was making up for her lack of speech in her dreams. I looked down at my feet – and nearly screamed as I walked right off the edge of a building roof! I tried to pull back, but I lost my balance and plummeted to the ground –

Someone or something quickly grabbed me, and I stared into the face of Spider-man. Surprised, I said, “What the heck!”

“I’m not Batman!” He yelled in my ear.