This was good, but confusing in spots. I expected to follow it better than I did, having watched OLTL for years, but it has been awhile and so this did confuse me in spots. Also a few typos but overall it was well written. It did go way over the 1,000 words though. Thanks for sharing!

"Woah hon, what in the heck are you reading?" Eric could feel Tami lean over him, and noticed her eyes scanning the player profile in front of him. "Looks like an engrossing read."

"Nosey are we?" He looked back down, enjoying the fun dialogue that the player had written. "I really like this story. The plot is really intense. I just have one gripe with this athlete."

Tami arched her eyebrow as she sat beside him on the couch. "What's that?"

He didnt' answer her at first, getting lost in the part about her being on the ledge and him having to save her. He let out a small laugh at the comment about her being borderline suicidal. She was full of sass and personality, despite her mental situation.

"Well, Eric, what's your gripe?"

He turned and faced Tami. "Just that in some of the dialogue it's kind of bare boned. I think a little more description wrapped around it would have made me not so confused on who was speaking at times. Other than that, this is really good."

"Glad you are enjoying yourself! I want to read it when you are done!"

"Shhhhhh!"

"What? I just walked in the door and haven't even said anything yet!" Chuck splayed his hand over his chest and shook his head.

"Yeah, but you were gonna and I don't wanna miss anything." Gary dipped his hand into a bowl of popcorn beside him on the sofa and tossed a couple of kernals in his mouth. His eyes never left the screen of the laptop balanced across his legs.

Chuck crossed the loft and circled behind his friend. "Hey, when did you get a laptop? You hate computers!"

Gary waved impatiently. "I'm trying to read here, Chuck. And, I don't hate computers. Besides, I figured with all this reading I'm doing I should get one."

"Is this another one of those contest entries?"

"Yeah. Wait...wait...I knew it! He kissed her! Ha!" Gary grinned and chomped on some more popcorn.

"So, I take it this is good one?" Chuck leaped over the back of the couch and landed beside Gary, spilling a litte popcorn onto the cushions. Shoving those into his mouth, Chuck nestled the bowl in his lap and leaned over."Turn it so I can see too."

Gary glared at him but angled the screen. "The dialogue's great; it's like I'm watching the show. And the detail is great too. Here, read this part:

>“I regret not convincing you to stay. To talk to. . .’ he stopped and pushed himself away from the ledge and turned away from her and looked down at the city. “Ramsey was too much of a threat. If he knew what I felt for you. . . it was better that he thought it was over.” <

"See? His actions add to the story and tell us about the character."

Chuck looked at his best friend with one eyebrow raised. "You're beginning to scare me, ya know that? Next thing I know you'll be lecturing me on my grammar. Doesn't that paper have anything for you to do?"

Gary sighed. "There's only a few grammar and punctuation mistakes, so...quit lookin' at me like that. I did go to college." He glanced at his watch. "But you're right, I have something in about thirty minutes."

Chuck snatched the computer away from him and said, "Okay, see ya later, Gar! Oh, by the way, could you grab me a beer from the fridge before you run out?"

The challenge words were inserted well and the story as a whole flowed ok. There were spots where the dialogue fell flat and there were one or two typos, otherwise it was a good job.

Oh, very pessimistic. I don't know the fandom, but these questions really portray his anxiety. Good work!